Never Ending Journey

~ Monica ~ Leave a comment

Never stop just because you feel defeated. The journey to the other side is attainable only after great suffering.” ~ Santosh Kalwar

I started my fitness journey the year I turned 40. I was ready for a change, but not because I was worried about what I looked like or what people thought of me. I was focused on my health. Motivation is huge when it comes to big changes and my motivation was I wanted to be as strong as I needed to be at 40 and also for the rest of my life. And I ended up with a result that was never the goal. I lost 100 lbs.

I 100% know I did that work. I started with a couch to 5k. I discovered CrossFit. I counted calories and then I moved to Paleo and eventually settled into just eating how I ate, mostly making good choices, but with some wiggle room for splurges. I found people who believed in me and encouraged me. I found community. And I discovered that when you have a community of like minded people who are invested in you as much as you are invested in them the work isn’t so hard. It really didn’t even feel like work. And for many years that was the norm.

But things changed. We moved back to America and I realized how unique that community was. It wasn’t something that could be duplicated. Even though I tried. I tried several gyms – Globo gyms, CrossFit gyms, and online programs. I tried to get friends to be that community, but that’s not how it works (or at least not how I could get it to work). I was going to have to do this on my own.

Doing it on my own is hard. It’s been full of fits and starts. I have had some periods of success, but there have also been some pretty big fall backs. There have been medical things and life things that have derailed me and I’ve allowed them to become excuses. I’ve gained some weight and lost some weight. I’ve lost some strength and gained some strength. Currently I’m in a place of gained some weight and lost some strength. I’ve been further off the rails, but I don’t want to get there. I want to get back on track or rather I want to be back on track, but I’m having a really hard time actually wanting to do the work to get there. For the most part I’m talking nutrition. I have been able to maintain the fitness side of things.

Marathon training will most likely contribute to some strength loss. I do not have the capacity to do both and I’m okay with that. But marathon training and weight gain are not expected. So I’m trying to dial in my nutrition. Clean it up some. Find what works for me at this stage of my life and I’m finding that challenging. But I can do challenging. I know I can.

Breakfast Salad

Too Soon?

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When it’s right it’s never too late, when it’s wrong it’s always too soon” ~ Sara Donati

Yesterday I completed stage one of my BMP (Bespoke Marathon Plan). Which was basically a 5 week 5k plan and starting week 3 of that plan I had to to substitute anything but running in for the running. I did turn my most recent few running workouts into walking workouts – just to test out how my toe is doing. It’s still swollen, it’s still very painful to the touch, and it doesn’t like being squeezed close to the other toes.

It hurts in the square, but it REALLY hurts where the arrow is pointing.

Probably that means I should keep resting and adapting and not running, but… I don’t want to. So I started stage two of my BMP by adding running back in. On declines it seemed okay. Flat surfaces were not too bad. Inclines were not so good. But the good news, I think, is that it doesn’t hurt any more this afternoon than it did before I ran. So maybe it’s okay.

Stage 2 is a 10k running plan. In two weeks I’ll be running the Centennial Airport Runway 5k. 8 weeks after that I’m hoping to get a 10k run in and then sometime around the 1st of November I’m thinking maybe a 1/2 marathon will fit in my programming. Might as well earn some medals while I train.

Uncomfortably Hard

~ Monica ~ 1 Comment

We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give. ~ Winston Churchill

My toe? It’s not broken. It’s still causing me problems, but it’s getting better and while running isn’t currently happening I am keeping on keeping on with the bike and the rower. Just getting that out of the way so I can get to the uncomfortably hard thing this post is about.

I was sharing my marathon journey with a co-worker, because are you really training for a marathon if you aren’t telling EVERYONE about it?? And he mentioned he was getting ready to run a marathon relay and fundraising for Compassion International. I had no idea there was a Team Compassion out there running and fundraising. A little background…

Michael worked for Compassion for 16 years. His job is how we ended up in Thailand. I currently work for Compassion and I recently celebrated my 8 year work-a-versary and before either of us worked for Compassion we sponsored kids. This year marks our 20th anniversary as sponsors and during that time we have supported seven children in four different countries. We have had the joy of visiting several of the children and have seen the incredible changes that are possible when a local church comes alongside a family in poverty.

I found the fundraising thing intriguing. And also scary. I don’t like asking people for things. And I really, really don’t like asking people for things that involve their money. It’s uncomfortable – a different kind of uncomfortable than running a marathon. I figure since I’m taking on hard things, why not do this and get uncomfortable? So here goes…

Globally, 800 children die daily from water-born disease from unsafe water. The funds you donate will provide vulnerable children living in poverty access to clean and safe drinking water—preventing life-threatening diseases and allowing them to stay in school and focus their energy on overcoming poverty. Your donations will provide essential water infrastructure such as wells, rainwater harvesting systems, and water storage and filtration, in addition to vital hygiene education. 

If you would be interested in donating to support me in this effort follow this link to my fundraising page.

A Harder Thing

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Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God.” ~ Corrie ten Boom

In the past few years we’ve (we = my husband, Michael, and myself) have had our fair share of hard things to deal with. Some happened to us and I feel comfortable talking about those in this space.

  • His best friend tried to kill him.
  • My cervical spine disc replacement.
  • My heart failure.

Others impacted us, but we weren’t the main character and I don’t feel comfortable talking about those because they really aren’t my story to tell.

But for the past year the hardest thing we’ve had is Michael’s job loss. Which was definitely not our choice, but also choices could have been made that did not equal job loss. It’s complicated.

However… he has never had a chance to think about what he really wants to be when he grows up. He was in college when we got married. We had our first kiddo before he graduated. No regrets there, but it also meant that once he graduated there wasn’t any time to think about what he really wanted to do. He was able to find something he enjoyed, but he always had to balance it with what would support our growing family. A year ago he was “provided the opportunity” to think about what he wants to be when he grows up AS A GROWN UP – that’s pretty amazing. So he took it. I mean we took it.

And for me that is the complicated part. I 100% support him and this decision. He did ask me. I have had to continuously remind myself over the past year of this truth, because I 100% would have preferred the security of a job.

He has spent the last year working really hard to make something happen, but also taking some time to invest in himself. He’s put some tools in his toolbelt that provide him ways to reach out to others and help them live better lives, and there is the potential he could leverage that into income. (Any one feeling the need for spiritual direction?) He’s been able to focus time on some passion projects – his consulting business and children’s ministry. He did some contract work and we thought we’d found part of the answer to what the future might look like, but the contract work was with the government and that all has been a wee bit unstable lately.

We’ve spent the last year

  • trusting God
  • praying (probably not as much as we should have)
  • discussing (also probably not as much as we should have)
  • having fun
  • waiting

And the time has come. The job search is beginning in earnest. We are not at the point of desperation, the point of any job will do. We are at the point of the search needs to look different than it has so that we don’t get to the point of desperation. We’ve been here before. It’s how we ended up in Thailand. I do not feel like we are at the point of me applying for jobs for Michael. Or at the point of moving countries (not saying we wouldn’t do it). But we are at the point of something needs to happen. I know it and Michael knows it.

And now I have to do the harder thing. Trust. Trust Michael to do what needs to be done. But even more than that is the Trust God part.

Adap-toe-ble

~ Monica ~ Leave a comment

If I do have a strength, it probably is adaptability. ~ Monty Williams

Accidentally kicked a door and now I’m negotiating my first unplanned training adaptation. Wasn’t going to go to the Dr because what do they do for an injured toe? But the limp I have started causing discomfort up my leg and I thought it best to know what I was dealing with – a break, a jam, a sprain, just some swelling – and how best to recover without causing other issues.

I managed to get a same day appt and then a quick trip to radiology for an X-ray. All to end up with a very unsatisfactory answer. They don’t see a break, but the doctor doesn’t have confidence that the X-ray is reliable due to swelling. So I’m in a boot for 10 days. Then we’ll reassess. Best case scenario that will be enough time to allow it to heal or at least give evidence that it’s healing. We’re not gonna talk about any other scenario.

So no running for now. Thankfully I have other options for continuing to train – janky bike and c2 rower to the rescue – and I’m still a ways out from actual marathon training.

working out with myself 🤣

Adventuring

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Be careful going in search of adventure – it’s ridiculously easy to find. ~ William Least Heat-Moon

Two weekends. Two National Parks.

Last weekend my daughter and I headed to the Eastern Range of the Rocky Mountains to Montrose. We spent a day in the Black Canyon of the Gunnison National Park. Our original plan was to spend two days in the park. Day one on the south rim and day two on the north rim, but the north rim is currently closed. Lucky for us, Colorado isn’t lacking for beautiful places to see. So we spent day two driving the Million Dollar Highway and hiking in Ouray.

This weekend Michael and I headed to Estes Park for a visit to the YMCA of the Rockies. It’s nestled right up next to Rocky Mountain National Park. Honestly, the YMCA property had more to offer than we could see in a weekend, but we have a National Park Pass, so how could we not take a little hike there?

The first trip I opted to change my training plan and know that I would be okay. This weekend I chose to stick to my plan, knowing I wouldn’t want to. I’d be tired and it wouldn’t be convenient. And I think it was the right call for both.

On the trip with my daughter we came up with my next plan. My what to do after the marathon plan. We’re gonna take on an epic backpacking trip through the Maroon Bells Four Loop Pass. We’ll do it sometime around August of 2026. I’m gonna have to work hard to not get distracted planning for that adventure while I’m trying to stay focused on my marathon adventure.

Balance

~ Monica ~ Leave a comment

I do find that there’s a fine balance between preparation and seeing what happens naturally. ~ Timothee Chalamet

I’m a rule follower. And I’m in the early days of marathon training. And I have crafted a very bespoke PLAN. And I have some already scheduled and some not so scheduled things interfering with my PLAN. It has been stressing me out. A lot. Not being able to get my 2.25 mile run in because a 10k hike got in the way had me worried that I’d ruined my marathon. But then I took a moment to think on it. And I realized a 10k hike was probably an okay substitute for a 2.25 mile run.

It has me thinking I cannot spend the next 7.5 months so attached to my PLAN that i miss out on important things. But… I also have to know there are important things I might miss out on because of my PLAN. It’s a balance. It’s a struggle. Maybe it’s #luxuriouslyhard

Putting the Plan in Place

~ Monica ~ 1 Comment

Our goals can only be reached through a vehicle of a plan, in which we must fervently believe, and upon which we must vigorously act. There is no other route to success. ~ Pablo Picasso

I’ve spent some time – maybe, possibly, most definitely more than necessary – coming up with a training plan to get me through the next 34 weeks. Is it a perfect plan? Certainly not, but I’m confident it will get me across the finish line.

I’m starting out building my base mileage and getting in some strength training. I’m basically doing a 5k plan followed by a 10k plan and then pivoting to marathon training. Run/walk is gonna be my jam knowing that it’s gonna get hard #luxuriouslyhard

Week one is almost done.

Permission Granted

~ Monica ~ Leave a comment

Go forth a conqueror and win great victories. ~ Virgil

Cardiologist appointment today. The best one in a long time and the first time I haven’t felt rushed through an appt since I switched my care team. All my recent tests look good which is very reassuring so we’re gonna adjust meds to see if the medication change late last year contributed to my more recent symptoms. I feel very good about that.

I asked about running a marathon and we discussed my training plan and I got a big ol’ stamp of approval. So here I go – full steam ahead!

A Clecision

~ Monica ~ 3 Comments

“It is difficult to train for a marathon, but it is even more difficult to not be able to train for a marathon.” ~ Aaron Douglas Trimble

Once upon a time I ran a half marathon. I did not love it or even like it. I actually sort of hated it. So makes total sense that a marathon – a whole one – would make it on my bucket list.

I’ve signed up for my first (only?) marathon. The Texas Double – Day one. I had to find a marathon with no time limit. I run a super slow mile now and I don’t think that time will get faster doing 26.2 of them. My only goal is to finish. My plan is to run/walk and I have no expectations of a time. The website for the run even says “Enjoy the luxury of no cutoff times!” It’s gonna be luxurious. It is gonna be hard. Luxuriously hard. Oh, wait, #luxuriouslyhard

I have talked to my cardiologist about working out and limitations and he seems super unbothered by it, but I haven’t specifically asked about running a marathon or run/walking a marathon. I have an appt on Friday. I’ll ask about it. We’ll see. I guess that is my first hurdle.

I’m assuming I’ll get the all clear there. So breaking down the rest of it – at least my understanding of it right now –

The pros?

  • There is a gun start. How wild west is that?
  • The run is not until December. I have plenty of time to train.
  • I have a training schedule and enough time to build my mileage up before the marathon training begins.
  • The course is at about 500 feet above sea level; most of my training will be done at about 6800 feet above sea level.
  • It’s a flat, fast course. I feel like flat is a promise the organizers can keep, but fast is in the feet of the runner.
  • Learning to fuel for a marathon.
  • Committing to this run probably means Christmas in Texas.

The cons?

  • There is a gun start. Don’t get shot.
  • My heart. Well, my heart is not a con, but it could be a reason I can’t complete this.
  • The time commitment training for a marathon requires.
  • Other possible injuries.
  • Learning to fuel for a marathon.

Currently the pros outweigh the cons. I expect this will shift back and forth through out this season, but I can do hard things. I can.